/Sunday, December 30, 2007
with love; 12:10 AM
One more day to 2008. I can't believe it's coming to an end and it's gonna be a new year soon. 2007 was one of the toughest year i had so far. All the memories of 2007 came flooding back to me. I wish i could rewind the time & undo things, something was amiss. So many things had happened, so many obstacles i've leap in 365 days. I'll admit that 2007 was ambushed with full of emotions. I kept replaying it over & over in my mind. I remembered clearly how stress i was during my Olevel period. I NEVER want to do it again. NEVER. Apart from schools and studies, i was a lil cranky. I have to apologise to both of my parents for being a lil stuborn. I manage to get myself back to root in time, thankfully. I swear i was full with emotions, a mixed one. Maybe, i'm a regular teenage who undergoes this 'normal cycle'. I believe every other human being undergoes the same too, i hope. Some days, i felt i'm the luckiest girl alive. Other days, i felt i'm the unluckiest, fattest and ugliest girl. Some afternoon, i would laugh endlessly. Some morning, i'll curse myself to get up to school. Then, there were the nights i cried myself to sleep. I had always dealt with my challenges by pushing down my feelings. I was filled with hopelessness and emphaty. At times, i felt i'm doing everything alone and that the world just brings me down. Things, peoples and feelings come and go in a fraction of a second. I realise, only the true will stay on. And i would like to emphasise again, the TRUE.
Then there were my great families and friends who assured me solemnly that everything was going to be fine. Those were the peoples who keep me secure, never fails to reassure me & had love me unconditionally. Talk about real love, i realise i have not fallen in love for quite sometime now. Maybe a year or so? I rather it stays like this. I've been jaded and disillusioned in the past. To be in love, it's too strong & powerful. To be in a relationship, it's too committed. & i'm never ready.
My greatest suprise for 2007 was that in the end it was no surprise.
